Dear U.S. House of Representatives, U.S. Senate, & President Obama,
Since approximately 5 months after Mr. Obama was inaugurated as President of the United States, our family has barely had enough money to scrape by & the situation continues to remain in a downward spiral. As Michigan residents, we feel this has much to do with our then-Governor, Jennifer Granholm, paying more attention to assisting Mr. Obama with his ‘transition team’ than in performing the duties associated with the job she held at that time, such as paying attention to the plight of Michigan jobs & businesses or to the dismal train wreck she was making of & preparing to leave our beautiful Great Lakes State in. Mr. Obama, it would appear, encouraged this deplorably neglectful behavior on the part of Ms. Granholm by enticing her with such things as the potential of a nomination as a Supreme Court Justice or United States Attorney General in his administration. We’ve attempted to maintain a sense of humor regarding this travesty by referring to it as “The Jenny ‘n Barry Show”.
Due to the numerous financial setbacks we’ve suffered, this year our family has found that we simply cannot arrive at a budget agreement we all feel is fair to all parties involved. In fact, we’re still struggling to pay off the only credit card we have, which we were forced to use to pay what you claimed we owed on taxes. Oddly enough, the issuer of that credit card, which was always intended to be used strictly for emergencies, has refused to raise our debt limit/ceiling.
Until such time as we are able to arrive at a unified decision that fits all of our various needs & any special interests, we find ourselves forced to shut down our checkbooks & will no longer be able to pay our taxes (aka your paychecks/’entitlements’–or had you forgotten that you work for us, we the people of the United States of America?).
We’re certain that, since you’ve now found yourselves in a similar position, you’ll be understanding of our predicament & will patiently await our decision regarding our family’s economic policies. As we’re sure you’re well aware, these are indeed difficult times for everyone during which we all must make sacrifices for the greater good. We’re also certain that you will all agree that family must come first–above all else.
We do wish to extend our sincerest gratitude to each & every one of you for setting such a fine example for us to follow regarding how to work things out like mature adults. We now know that it’s perfectly acceptable to simply storm out of the room without even hearing what our other family members have to say, which is such a relief! It saves us so much strain of actually having to think of ways in which we can compromise & meet one another halfway! We’ve also learned that, contrary to what we’d been taught throughout our lives, name-calling is permissible as is caving in to the demands of those family member(s) who happen to be the most raucous, regardless of whether doing so is in the best interests of all parties concerned/affected. We also are now aware that, once we’ve stomped away from negotiations to do things we find more interesting & less stressful (such as planning lavish birthday celebrations), we can simply veto or immediately vote down anything put forth by those family members that did bother to remain in the room continuing to try to work things out & we barely even have to give their proposal a second glance before doing so. What a weight off our already heavily-burdened shoulders! Thank you again, ladies & gentlemen, for your fine examples of true leadership!
Sincerest gratitude for your patience & understanding,
Cari L. Pedstelak & Family